I feel sort of homesick. Not so much for the hustle and bustle of San Diego. I guess for the family and friends i've left behind here.
Went to Cambria today to spend time with my grandmother and sister and cousins who just spent the week up there. They rented a beautiful house that overlooked the water. It was very peaceful. Went on a two-mile walk. Ate actual food (I've been pretty malnourished seeing as I can't cook for myself) and brought leftovers home.
I really fought back tears saying goodbye to my grandma. She is my rock. We've been through so much together. I spent every day with her during my treatment. It was so hard to keep from losing it when she hugged me goodbye.
I don't feel like I did when I left home two years ago. Back then I knew in my heart that the choice I had made was not the right one. Now, I feel like right now I'm in the right place at the right time. I guess its just never very easy to say goodbye to your loved ones.
I just keep telling myself to press on. Every day gets a little bit easier, and sometimes we backtrack but the next day we wake up and put on our shoes and walk forward into another day with another roller coaster of emotions.
Life isn't static...and that is the pain in the ass.
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2 comments:
That makes me really really really really really really glad to hear that you are finally like finding the right place and right college that you actually like (unlike a certain school in LA that i refuse the say the name of). Im glad it is going so well!
also i think it is a good think that you miss you family and friends and stuff because if you didnt that would be kind of weird and sad. I know soon that san luis obispo will feel like a 2nd home and you will feel like you have lived there a long time
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